pixies - where is my mind?

tired... so very very sleepy. not much energy these days. but it's cool. crew has been going wonderfully. today we were out rowing on the water (first time for me since the season started!) and it started raining. rain around here goes either one of two ways. one, it could be some kind of small drizzle that doesn't do much except make your hair frizz out. or it goes all out, water pouring down from the sky, flooding the sidewalks and roads and making huge puddles on the freeways. today we had that kind of rain. instantly the lake went flat, and we were all soaked down to our underwear. we're sitting out there on the lake, cheering and laughing just for the hell of it, rain coming down all around us... it was beautiful.
i'm looking forward to saturday - helping brent move into his dorm and all. but i'm dreading it, too. because once we drive away, i won't see him again until thanksgiving.
oh, right. and i got a $715 ticket for speeding in a school zone and not having proof of insurance.

pulley - the ocean song

i'm frustrated! i want to be friends with these fuckers, but it's hard when they're so stupid!! whatever. maybe i'll find someone else to carpool with. maybe jon still wants a ride. i understand the whole not wanting to piss off a friend thing with jaryd, but i still don't want to drive around that early in the morning by myself.
it's hard for me to stay focused on anything lately.. i think about crew or drinking sobes or seeing david and william soon... and you know, i just lose track of the moment. i want to go do things again!! michelle's waiting impatiently for me to be able to go outside again, so we can start watching the jump cut films at the grand every weekend. i just got a book in the mail i bought off ebay about 2 weeks ago - finally! plus i've got a good sized list of books to track down. i really need to find an al's version of a book store. and we'll be cooking at OSC soon! i think. maybe in a week. whatever. and then the best part of all! i bought a dispatch cd at al's a week ago, but haven't listened to it yet because i also bought deathcab and led zeppelin. so i finally put it in and it's got a little bit of a reggae kick to it! reggae/punk that's really something entirely to itself. i love it!
and so tomorrow i get to drive to OSC all by myself (sad!) and maybe nap at the house before going to english (favorite subject. could you not tell, with my whole book fetish?) and carpooling with sarah down to crew. and sweet! i just found an unopened can of diet coke behind some empty sobe bottles! life is good.