i borrowed tuey's our lady peace cd today. good. i'm happy to hear them again. i miss my old cd. i'm waiting, wondering if ryan's ever going to send me his copy. probably not. i drank the last pepsi one today. it almost tasted like diet coke - i went through the whole 12-pack since saturday. i want to go driving. but my dad's not home. and i'm probably going to fall asleep early tonight. i have so much stuff to do. it's insane. i just can't do it. i'm dwelling on things - brooding. i shouldn't be so bothered by this!!! i shouldn't be taking this out on steph mo !! - although i don't think she's noticed, fortunately. but thinking like this isn't good for me. i get bitter and reclusive and, well... it's just not fun for me. my days are miserable. i need to get out and do something with someone. someone new. that's what i need. i need to meet some new people to take my mind off of the people i know.
i need to go to long beach.
it's sad, though. i don't think it would work as well as it used to.